feminine masculine confusion

[Scott Walker]

if i am say something like my friend or my love does it matter the gender of the speaker and the gender of the listener? this has always confused me. For example if i am a man speaking to a woman would it be "mon cherie" because i am a man, or would it be "ma cherie" because she is a woman? Or am i completely off?

Scott

[James H Smith]

Puis-j'aider ?
To the best of my knowledge, "mon", "ma" and "mes" are possessive adjectives meaning "my....". They always agree with the "thing" possessed. The gender of the speaker (you, in this case) does not enter into it.
Therefore, it goes like this:-
ma chérie (to a female)
mon chéri (to a male), be careful with this one, for obvious reasons !!!
mon* amie (my female friend)
mon ami (my male friend)
mes amis (my male friends, or group of mixed gender*)
mes amies (my female friends).
The gender of the person you are talking to or about also affects the spelling of the noun, as you can see.
* You may notice that I have used "mon amie". This seems contradictory, but you use the masculine version when otherwise two vowels would come together; "ma amie" would sound awkward. In French generally, when there is a conflict of grammar, the masculine version is used as the default. This applies to "mes amis" (group of mixed gender) which defaults to the masc. spelling of "friends".
In short, the gender of the speaker is ignored; it's all about the person you are talking to or about. And why not ?
Hoping this helps.
À bientôt.

[Scott Walker]

That does clear it up.
Thank you very much.